Brené Brown And The Power Of Vulnerability

How our sense of worthiness can alter reality

Konstantinos P.
4 min readApr 10, 2021

What does it mean to be vulnerable?

How can our sense of worthiness alter reality? Is there any value to it?

It’s been 10 years since Dr. Brown’s infamous TED talk, but her message on the power of vulnerability is more relevant than ever.

Her work and attitude as a qualitative researcher sparked my interest once more when she appeared as a guest at Tim Ferriss’s podcast, a few months ago. However, I noticed that her knowledge and decades of empirical research weren’t the elements that allured me.

What actually inspired me was her openness and the sense of worthiness that was reflected in the way she expressed herself, both physically and mentally.

She didn’t attempt to present herself as perfect and whole. On the contrary, she was vulnerable and compassionate, and most importantly, a total conscious goofball.

Personally, I consider the way she embodies her philosophy as authentic and worth remembering. Moreover, it is my view that amidst the current sociopolitical and existential crisis of the 21st century, being vulnerable can be a powerful tool to reinvent our connection with ourselves, other people, and the world.

Connection and Belief

According to Dr. Brene Brown, the ability to connect is imperative to our meaning-making process. This ability can be either promoted or undermined by our sense of worthiness, love, and belonging.

After thousands of interviews and stories, Dr. Brown concluded that there’s one essential variable that differentiates between individuals with a strong sense of love and belonging versus those that struggle for it.

Belief.

On one hand, individuals with a high sense of love and belonging, actually believe that they are worthy of connection. On the other hand, people that are disconnected are characterized by shame and fear. They are caught up in the ‘I’m not good enough’ endless circle.

At this point, you may wonder:

‘If it’s so simple, why isn’t everyone doing it?’

Dr. Brown understands that ‘simple’ doesn’t imply ‘easy’. That’s why she analyzed the characteristics of individuals with a high sense of worthiness, so as to provide the necessary tools for mental rewiring :

  1. Courage. We shouldn’t rush and mistaken courage for bravery all the time. According to the dictionary, ‘Cor’ means heart. Thus, the initial meaning of courage is to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart, Brene says.
  2. Compassion. It is defined as ‘the emotional response when perceiving suffering and involves an authentic desire to help.’ Compassion towards ourselves and others has been linked to greater psychological well-being and connection, longevity, as well as a broader perspective that goes beyond ourselves. However, it’s worth noting that, as Dr. Brown says, compassion starts with our own identity.
  3. Vulnerability. The power of vulnerability is immense and necessary, in order for someone to fully embrace and express her identity, thoughts, and emotions without shame and fear. Being vulnerable doesn’t mean being fragile and weak. On the contrary, it reflects a willingness to be authentic about your fragility as well as your resilience.

Communitas

It’s going to sound like a cliché, but our belief in our sense of worthiness can indeed alter our reality, as it affects our ability to connect and create meaning.

Still, it can be a rough journey. It can be a tough and excruciating process.
It requires rewiring, relearning, as well as being conscious and open-minded.

Especially amidst the turmoil of the 21st century, I feel like we have to go against the grain of toxic masculinity and uptightness, which lacks expression and authenticity. I strongly believe that we can achieve that by creating habits, communities of practice, and sacred spaces that promote courage, compassion, and vulnerability.

Personally, I’ve been practicing meditation and breathwork for quite a while, alone and with others. I would totally recommend Metta meditation, a ‘tool’ that can cultivate compassion and open-mindedness.

In addition, I’ve been lucky enough to be part of a wonderful community.
We have created spaciousness for authentic expression without boundaries, judgment, or Ego. I’m extremely grateful for that, as it made me a better human being, across multiple domains, even outside this community.

We grow better, together, and through connection.

In conclusion, I’d like to give you a quote from Dr. Brene Brown’s TED talk:

‘You are imperfect, you are wired for struggle. But you are worthy of love and belonging’ — Dr. Brené Brown

Thank you for your time and attention

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Konstantinos P.

I share stories about physical and mental flexibility, using my own personal experience and up-to-date scientific data. (Physio, Ultra-Runner, Psych)